My Dear Wife,
All I had predicted occurred. Chang-an has been captured, Xuanzong has fled, and Yang Guozhong has been murdered. I am still in a state of shock; shock at how I have ended up being a fighter and a warrior as opposed to a tradesman, a good man. I was lying on the dirt smelling the grass’s wind, and was reminding of the beautiful clay pots we used to make together. I remembered traveling to neighbouring towns selling them for fruits. I remember growing herbs and spices and trading them along the Silk Road, and oh how abundant and convenient that route was! Now, all of the tradesman are sent to war, like me, fighting rather than producing.
When I left, the Tang Dynasty was at its peak in the arts, military, power, and intellect. The Silk Road was booming and this impressive trading system was integrating communities all across Asia. With thousands of men being called to war, the women are now forced solely to stay at home and watch the family, leaving the trading and agriculture to diminish. Chinese culture is slowly dissolving into power hungry revolters, and I am not sure where that leaves me. I do not think I am the only one with these thoughts, I have overheard other army men beginning to worry about An-Lushan’s plans. He has not even joined us here in Chang-an as he has remained stationed in Luoyang. Word is spreading that he has fallen ill and may even be going blind. If he dies, what then will happen to us? What will our next plan be? Yang Guozhong was unable to gather a strong enough military base, resulting in his defeat. That was his weakness, however An-lushan must have a weakness as well. Will his illness result in our downfall and the downfall of the powerful Tang Dynasty?
I hope my letters have reached you and I hope you keep faith, as I am slowly losing mine.
My heart is yours forever,
Chu
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